May Flowers

After an unexpected second surgery on my knee and an extra month on crutches, my family decided that it was time to swoop in again. Mom was up first. I traded a few nights of snoring for a clean apartment, laundry, and stocked fridge (or at least what I consider to be stocked). Since I was more mobile now relative to her visit in March, I could show my mom more of the city. This included an afternoon reading in sunny Washington Park and sharing Argentine cuisine at Maria Empanada.

We also sought out a mountain escape in Nederland--a small historic mining town that is home to Eldora Mountain Resort.

A spring-time stretch of gloomy weather finally cleared up in time for Mother's Day. Mom and I indulged in pastries for breakfast, basked in the sun at the local Whole Foods Market, and joined Anna, Alex, and his mom, Eileen, at Stem Ciders in RiNo. When it was time for her return to Pittsburgh, I remembered very clearly how lucky I am to have a mother like mine.

No sooner had my mother left town when my sister, Rita, flew in for a long weekend. Despite the list of chores that I assigned, I did allow her some fun, including snow-shoeing in Breckenridge and fly fishing on the South Platte River.

We spent a lot of time with Anna and Alex, mostly to watch the Penguins dominate playoff hockey.

Goodbyes are never easy, but I am certain that Rita will be back again soon. My family's visits this month have served as a much-needed distraction from my injury. Here's to hoping that I am back on my feet next time they come around!

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April Showers

April is one of my favorite months because it symbolizes a peaceful time of year--Spring, Easter, and family birthdays. Though I appreciate every season in turn, Spring is unparalleled in its significance. Mother Nature awakens from her deep slumber to give renewed life to all that is pure and beautiful--budding trees, fragrant florals, green grass, and little birds singing their morning melodies. With this comes the return of longer days and whispering winds of hope. It's an annual gift that can only be fully respected after enduring a long and harsh winter.

On Easter Sunday, I joined Anna and Alex at Rob and Cait's house in Aurora. In the company of their dogs, Jax and Sperry, we shared a home-cooked feast and watched the Pittsburgh Penguins playoff game.

Now more than ever, I feel grateful to have family nearby to lean on through my recovery.

At 25 years old, I am more mature than I was last April. Much has happened in the past year to support my growth; finishing grad school, moving to Colorado, a summer biking to Whole Foods and climbing fourteeners, becoming a pharmacist on my own terms, buying my first car, a winter skiing and trying every local beer I could get my hands on, commissioning as a USAF Pharmacist... I felt extremely lucky for such a wonderful year, as everything seemed to be falling into place--that is until my skiing accident last month. It was an unexpected turn of events that reminded me that life can change in an instant. It took a long time for me to feel like myself again, but I am now prepared to accept the consequences of my injury. Every day is a challenge, but I understand how to cope and move forward because I am a stronger person than I was last year.

A Light at the End of the Tunnel

At the start of April, I have little to report on other than the status of my recovery. One month out from my accident and surgery, I am roughly half way through the first stage of recovery--using crutches to navigate, as I cannot place any weight on my left leg. In another month, I will gradually begin to bear weight on my leg, and hopefully gain strength and mobility from there.

After my mother returned to Pittsburgh, I tried to keep myself occupied as much as possible. PT and work were good distractions, but I still longed for my previous lifestyle. I've never been one to sit around, so two months of sitting around was a real challenge. Amid the chaos of the trauma, I somehow lost sight of what I was fighting for. As a result, I doubted my strength in overcoming the obstacle at hand. I began to feel weak and hopeless. Rock bottom.

Today, however, I turned a corner. I stumbled upon an online forum specific to my injury. I scrolled through the site, reading various posts of personal experiences with the injury--some positive, others not. One post specifically caught my attention--an uplifting story shared by Brian. I sympathized with his suffering through the initial stages of his injury, but was inspired by his determination to work towards and reach his goals. Two years after his accident, he became an Ironman athlete. That was when I realized that I needed to set a concrete goal to fuel my own motivation. Making a “full recovery” wasn’t enough. I decided then that I, too, would become a triathlon athlete. Completing a triathlon is among the top items on my bucket list, and I will not let my injury change that. It won’t be an easy road, or a quick one at that. However, I have proved time and time again how capable I am in pursuing goals. This one will be no different.

Later this afternoon, a woman at the grocery store inspired me further. As a young female on crutches, I have apparently become an instant target for others to lend a hand to. However, I noted the difference in this particular interaction when she asked if I had been injured skiing. Turns out, Jennifer had the same injury as mine in December! And here she was, four months later, doing just fine--no crutches, no brace; just a slight limp and stiffness as she continues her own journey towards recovery. She empathized with the initial recovery stage that I am in, and assured me that it will get better. Her body began to improve exponentially after she started to bear weight on her injured leg. Everyone's recovery is different, but she renewed my faith that I won’t go on this way forever.

I am eternally grateful for the continued support of family and friends throughout this journey, but the testimonies of these two individuals were what I needed to move forward. Now I am more determined than ever to work hard at PT so that I am as strong as possible when I begin to put weight on my injured leg in a few weeks.

An important realization that I am accepting is that my injury will not be a finite chapter in my life. That is, it will not cease to be part of my life when I make a “full recovery.” Instead, it is a weight that I will carry with me always; one that will constantly challenge me both physically and mentally. I don’t know why this happened to me--especially at such a critical time in my professional and personal life--but one thing that I do know is that I am forever changed by this experience. I will continue learning and growing from it, and likely become a stronger and more complete person because of it.

The final piece of the puzzle lies with my military status. Will my newfound hopes and dreams be crushed if I am disqualified? Or will I acknowledge that my injury acted as a catalyst for me to take a different--perhaps more significant--path?

In closing, I have caught a glimpse of the light at the end of the tunnel and I plan to keep it in sight at all times. As it turns out, my knee might be broken, but I will not let it break my spirit. What defines us in the end, after all, is how we rise after falling.

The Road to Recovery

Thank goodness for mothers! Luckily, mine knew just when I needed her most. She flew into Denver a few days after my skiing injury, equipped with the essentials: board games, puzzles, coloring books, and--best of all--a big squeeze.

After spending my initial recovery period at Anna's place, I was happy to return to my shoebox apartment. It might be small, but it's home. The week passed slowly with fluctuating weather--just like my spirits. It was a constant struggle to stay positive when everything felt so wrong.

Fortunately, my first follow-up appointment went well. The x-rays of my knee were clean, and my physician cleared me to work and drive as I felt ready. I was also assigned to begin two physical therapy (PT) sessions each week for six weeks. My first two sessions went well, and provided the confidence that I needed to acknowledge that I was indeed recovering.

Part of my frustration during the week was the circumstances of my mom's visit. All I wanted to do was share my city with her, but I had to accept that this wasn't the time for that--she came to take care of me and get me "back on my feet."

Still, we did have some fun. One night, Dana joined us at Vine Street Pub & Brewery (#35). Mom and I also made it to Cheesman Park and neighboring Denver Botanic Gardens. The gardens bloomed with spring flowers, and sponsored a local cactus and succulent sale.

The highlight of the week was our over-night trip to Estes Park. Gateway to Rocky Mountain National Park, this mountain town provided the opportunity to escape the city and breathe in much-needed fresh air.


















Estes Park is home to wildlife, including elk--Mom's favorite.

We treated ourselves to a fabulous dinner at Rock Inn Mountain Tavern...

...and a good night's sleep and hot shower at Murphy's Resort.

My injury is testing my physical, emotional, psychological, and spiritual strength.  Living a healthy and active lifestyle defines who I am; it is a passion that facilitates my happiness and my independence. As a result, it’s not just my knee that was broken; my spirit broke, too. I’ve never faced a hardship like this before. With my mom here this week, I let myself fall apart because I knew that she could put me back together.

Two weeks out, things are starting to look up. I will continue making progress with PT and ease my way back into work at Omnicare. My main uncertainty at this point is where I stand with the military (as usual). I still have a long road ahead of me; six more weeks on crutches until I can start bearing weight on my left leg. From there, I will have to motivate myself to gradually return to my previous physical level of activity. It won't be easy, but I believe that I will make a full recovery and be a stronger person in every way imaginable.

As expected, I have already taken away several lessons (and some reminders) from this experience:

• Do not underestimate the importance of proper rest, fuel, and stretching.
• Slow down and remember that I can't always be in control. It doesn't always matter what we expect from life, but rather what life expects from us. 
• Everything happens for a reason and everything will turn out as it should. Moving forward is not always straight ahead.
• It is okay to depend on loved ones in times of need. The support and generosity of family and friends that I have received has been overwhelming.
• We must keep a healthy perspective of our own situation, and be grateful for those dealing with circumstances much worse than our own. Things could always be worse.
• Last but not least, Mom is always right--March came in like a lamb, and inevitably went out like a lion.

A Turn for the Worst at Keystone

Keystone had been calling my name for some time, so I answered the call on Thursday morning. The conditions were idillic for my liking: 40s and blue skies, though more crowded than usual for a weekday--early spring-breakers perhaps?





I met up with co-workers, Van and Ed, and we skied hard, hitting all three peaks that morning (though still sticking to blue cruisers). I had skied at Keystone once at the end of last season, so the layout of the mountain came back to me quickly. The scenery and long runs easily make it a favorite. The back side of the mountain, however, was extremely gusty that day, so we only stayed for a few runs.









Ed left around noon, and I wanted to get in a few more solo runs before calling it a day. I suspect that I was more fatigued than I realized--and should have at least taken a break to eat--because I was unable to catch myself when my ski caught an edge. I fell forward and twisted my knee in the process. I immediately knew that I was injured and needed help.

Ski patrol took me to the mountain emergency clinic via sled and the x-ray showed that I fractured my left tibial plateau--a bone in my knee. From there, an ambulance took me to St. Anthony's Summit Medial Center in Frisco. My surgeon, Dr. Joseph, confirmed the commonality of the injury among skiers, which fortunately signified a somewhat routine and predictable repair. I passed the next 24 hours at the hospital in a daze until Anna picked me up and brought me to her apartment, where I spent the next few days. Aspen and I took care of each other while Anna and Alex went to a friend's wedding in California.

After eight weeks on crutches, I am expected to make a full recovery. For that, I am grateful in knowing that my injury could have been much worse. Still, as a passionately active person, I expect the recovery to take its toll on me both physically and emotionally. My future seems impossibly uncertain at this point (with the Air Force, especially), but I am challenging myself to find strength, courage, and peace in knowing that everything happens for a reason. The lessons that I have already learned through this is to slow down and rely on loved ones for help.

 

Business as Usual

March is typically a swing month in terms of weather. My mother always says that if the month comes in like a lion, it goes out like a lamb (and vice versa). This year, the weather was relatively mild in early March, which does not bode well for winter ending anytime soon... if you believe in that sort of thing, anyway.

Knowing my time in Denver is limited, I have been making an effort to maximize my time in the city. For example, I've been staying on top of work, reading, running, and yoga. One afternoon in particular, I took a bike ride to my favorite Wash Park neighborhood.
























Later that week, Dana and I checked out the art scene in the Santa Fe district. We also tried two local breweries: Dry Dock and Renegade (#34).



I then spent the weekend in LoDo, cat sitting for Alex and Anna. Though partial to my side of town, I always enjoy exploring new areas of the city.











In the meantime, as of March 3rd, 2017, there is officially a Captain Schaller in the family!

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